變與不變 Change and Constancy

       

       

        那天教完華語課後，我來到附近的捷運車站，準備進站搭車返家之前，拿出背包裡的水杯喝水，但不小心將杯蓋掉落地面，我拾起杯蓋，沒有直接右轉進站搭捷運，而是往前方走廊底端的女化妝室前行，要去把杯蓋洗乾淨。

        After teaching a Mandarin class that day, I arrived at a nearby MRT station, and before getting ready to board the train home, I took out a bottle of water from my backpack for a drink, but I accidentally let the lid fall on the floor. I picked up the lid and didn't make a right turn directly into the MRT, but instead walked down the passageway to the women's restroom to wash off the lid.

        當我走在長廊上，不知是哪來的預感，我竟感覺到，也許這個看似再平凡不過的生活小事，會使我展開不同的生活際遇，遇見不一樣的人事物，只因一個掉落的水杯蓋……

When I walked through the corridor, having no clue where this premonition came from, I unexpectedly felt, that maybe the seemingly unremarkable trifles in life, would open me up to different destinies, causing me to encounter all kinds of people and things, all because of a fallen water bottle cap…

        在化妝室清洗杯蓋時，突然聽見警報器響起，原本以為是有人誤觸警鈴，所以不以為意，沒想到從化妝室出來，竟然聞到嗆鼻的煙味，而且味道愈來愈濃，此時捷運站緊急廣播，得知鄰近大樓發生火災，火勢猛烈，陣陣黑煙不斷竄出，連捷運站內都濃煙蔓佈。我當下只想盡速逃離這裡，被嗆鼻的濃煙包圍，令人頭暈腦脹，快喘不過氣，非常難受。我只想快一點跳上捷運車廂，明明知道是反方向的車，我也坐上去了。

        While in the restroom cleaning the cap, I suddenly heard the sound of sirens, and originally believed someone caused a false alarm, so I didn't mind. I never thought that from out of the restroom, I'd unexpectedly catch a whiff of smoke. As the smell became more and more dense, the MRT made an emergency broadcast, and I learned that a nearby high-rise was on fire, an intense fire, with puffs of black smoke billowing out, even inside the MRT station was a thick smoke cloth. I immediately wanted to escape as soon as possible, inhaling thick smoke leads to dizziness and brain swelling, when you’re almost out of breath, it can be very painful. I only wanted to jump aboard the MRT train a little faster, knowing it was a train for the opposite direction, I still sat in it to leave.

        進入捷運車廂，有一種獲救的感覺。空氣中仍瀰漫著淡淡的煙味，耳邊不斷傳來消防車、救護車呼嘯而過的聲音，我坐在與目的地背道而馳的列車中，安靜坐在位子上，為這場火災禱告，祈求神讓火勢迅速撲滅，讓受困的人平安獲救。

Upon entering the MRT train car, there was a feeling of being rescued. The air was still filled with the faint smell of smoke, my ears constantly heard the roar of fire trucks and ambulances whiz by, I sat in the train headed away from my destination, quietly sitting in the seat, praying for the fire, praying to God to quickly extinguish the fire, to safely rescue the trapped people.

        一個水杯蓋，為我帶來一段不一樣的際遇和旅程。我第一次搭乘這條捷運新路線，觀看窗外不同風景和新鮮人事物的同時，也將我的記憶帶回到多年前的某一天……

One water bottle cap, brought to me different encounters and a different journey. It was my first time on this MRT line, gazing out the window at various scenes and fresh new people and things, but at the same time my memory brought me back to a certain day many years ago...

        那天傍晚，我抱著六個月大的兒子回娘家吃晚餐，與媽媽和已高齡九十多歲的外公一起用餐，享受著四代同堂的天倫之樂，和桌上充滿有媽媽味道的美味佳餚。在有說有笑的溫馨時刻，我們忽然聽見社區的火災警鈴響起，屋外不停地廣播：「火災、火災，六樓發生火災，請盡速逃生」，警鈴與廣播的陣陣催促聲，讓人恐慌。原先的歡樂時光，突然逆轉成驚慌時刻，尤其要帶著六個月大的嬰兒，和九十多歲的老人家逃難，更是困難重重！

On that evening, I carried my six month old son back home, with mama and my already elder grandfather of 90+ years of age to eat dinner together, enjoying the happiness of spending time with four generations of family, the table full of mama's home cooked delicacies. Amidst the warm moments of talking and laughing, we suddenly heard the sound of our community's fire alarm, unceasingly broadcasting outside the room "Fire, Fire, Fire on the Sixth Floor, Please Evacuate Immediately", the pulsing sounds of urgency from the alarm and announcement made people panic. What once were happy moments, suddenly reversed into a reign of panic, especially when fleeing with a six month old baby and an elderly man in his 90s, it's even more difficult!

          我們從16樓的住家跑到樓梯間，一路煙霧瀰漫，我們非常擔心火舌和濃煙會衝過來，也不確定究竟該往上逃或是往下逃。我感受到一股母性的天然力量，我必須抱緊懷中的嬰孩脫困，孩子雙眼直視著我，似乎也感受到不尋常的緊張氣氛。我選擇往下奔跑，並不時回頭呼喚媽媽和外公，媽媽攙扶著外公一步步往下走，非常辛苦和無助，那種擔憂家人和自身陷入火海的恐懼，非筆墨所能形容。

We ran from our home on the 16th floor to the stairwell, through all the thick smoke. We were worried that the flames and smoke would reach us, and were ultimately uncertain if we should climb up or down the stairs. I could feel the natural strength of motherhood, I had to cradle the baby in my arms and escape the fire, the child's eyes looking directly at me as if he could sense an unusual tension. I choose to run down, periodically calling back to my mother and grandfather. My mother assisted my grandfather down the stairs one step at a time, which was very painstaking and utterly helpless, that tormenting fear of you and your family engulfed in flames, is beyond words.

        我抱著孩子好不容易逃到一樓社區中庭，我早已雙腿發軟，身心俱疲，等到看見媽媽扶著外公也從16樓平安走下來，我才真的鬆了一口氣。此時，社區中庭擠滿了鄰居，平日大家不常見面，沒想到卻在這種情況下，彼此相識，交談問候，譬如一位親切的老奶奶，對著累癱坐在地上、抱著嬰孩的我說：「孩子長得真可愛，和我長得真像」之類的對話，拉近鄰居之間的距離。隨後我得知，原來六樓的起火原因是客廳的電視機自燃，無人在家，真是令人感嘆事事多變化，誰也無法掌握下一秒會發生什麼事？

 I carried my baby with great difficulty down to the first floor atrium, my legs were already weak, my body and mind were completely exhausted, and it wasn't until I saw my mother helping my grandfather all the way down from the 16th floor safely, that I could really let out a sigh of relief. At this point, the atrium was packed with neighbors. Everyone doesn't usually see each other, so who would have thought that under these circumstances, we'd get to know each other through greetings and conversation. For instance, there was a kind old grandmother who spoke to me, a tired and paralyzed woman sitting on the floor, holding her baby, and said things like "my,  what a cute child, he looks just like his mother…" Conversations like this helped to close the distance between neighbors. Then I learned that the original cause of the fire on the sixth floor was because a living room television shorted out and combusted, no one was home. It really is lamentable how everything changes, and yet who has the ability to control what will happen in the next second?

        人生似乎充滿變化，似乎是由一連串的選擇（如往上或往下，往左或往右）、巧合、偶然所組成的，正如有句話說：「最大的不變就是變」，但果真如此嗎？

Our lives are seemingly full of change, as if it's all brought about by a string of decisions (like should I go up or down, left or right), coincidence, and chance. Just as the saying goes "the greatest constant is change", but is this really so?

        印象中自從我二十多歲，就有白頭髮了，但由於數量很少，我並不在意，尤其有一回，我翻開聖經看見一段話，讓我深感，白髮對我而言，竟然可以成為一種很棒的提醒！那段話出現在馬太福音第五章36節：「又不可指著你的頭起誓，因為你不能使一根頭髮變黑變白了」。我看著頭上那幾根白髮，心裡想著：「是啊！我確實無法使一根頭髮變黑、變白，我連一根頭髮都搞不定」。這更讓我確信我的生命氣息、生活中的大小事，其掌權者絕對不是無能的我，而是聖經所描述那位創造宇宙萬物、掌管一切的全能神。神愛世人，祂對我們每一個人在凡事上都有獨特的計劃和帶領，沒有一件事情是偶然。即使人世間千變萬化，但神的慈愛、信實與話語卻永不改變，就如詩篇所說：「我的神啊，惟有你永不改變，你的年數沒有窮盡」（詩篇102：27）。

 I'm under the impression that I've had white hairs since my twenties, but because they were few in number, I really didn't mind, especially one time in particular, I opened the Bible to a passage which struck me, so white hair, as far as I'm concerned, can actually be a great reminder! The words appear in Matthew 5:36: "And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black." I looked at those few white hairs on my head, thinking "Yeah! I truly have no way to make one hair turn black or white, even just a single hair is out of my control." This really affirmed in me that the breath of life, the matters in life big or small, are certainly not ruled by the incompetent me, but rather by the creator of all things as described in the Bible, the one in charge of all, the Almighty God. God so loved the world, He has given each individual person a unique plan and guide for everything, so that not one thing is left to chance. Even though our world is constantly changing, God's love, faithfulness and the word of God will never change, according to Psalms "My God, You remain the same, and your years will never end" (Psalms 102:27).

          人的一生中，有高山、低谷、歡笑、傷悲，甚至落入烈火的試煉中。聖經記載了ㄧ段令人讚嘆的故事，說到但以理的三個朋友，沒有照著國王的命令敬拜金像，王大怒，吩咐人將他們捆起來，扔在烈火的窯中。後來，國王驚奇地看見，竟然有四個人，並沒有捆綁，在火中遊行，也沒有受傷，那第四個的相貌好像神子（但以理書三25），也就是真神與他們同在。於是，國王請他們三個人從火窯中出來，親眼目睹火無力傷他們的身體，頭髮也沒有燒焦，衣裳也沒有變色，並沒有火燎的氣味（但以理書三27）。因為他們三人誓死不拜金像，只敬拜與信靠真神，神就與他們同在同行，施行拯救，將他們從烈火的窯中拯救出來。

In a person's life, there are high mountains, low valleys, laughter, sadness, and even dives into trials of fire. The Bible records an admirable story that talks about Daniel's three friends who didn't follow the king's orders to worship the golden idol. The king was furious, and commanded that they be tied up, and thrown into a blazing furnace. Afterwards, the king was surprised to see that there were actually four men, all unbound, travelling through the fire, all without injury, and the fourth one looked like the Son of God (Daniel 3:25), that is, the true God was with them. So, the king asked those three men to come out of the fiery furnace, and with his own eyes saw the fire had no power to hurt their bodies, their hair had not been burnt, their clothing had not changed color, and they didn't even smell of fire (Daniel 3:27). Because the three of them would rather die than worship the golden idol, and only worship and trust the true God, God was with them every step of the way, providing salvation, allowing them to be rescued from the fiery furnace.

          一個掉落的水杯蓋，帶給我一連串關於「火」的思緒 ，思考「變與不變」。無論如何，我相信「我們經過水火，神卻使我們到豐富之地（詩篇六十六12）」，這是不變的真理。  

    

A fallen water bottle cap, led me to a chain of thoughts regarding "fire", and to ponder "change and constancy". No matter what, I believe "we went through fire and water, but You brought us to a place of abundance" (Psalms 66:12), this is a constant truth.

作者:譚亞菁 June.02, 2013

Translated by Parker Gadbois